road ragggggge

i fucking hate traffic. a drive that should have taken me no more than 5 minutes took over an hour becasue the fucking pigs blocked off merrick road thus i coulnd*t pick up my film and wasted tons of gas.
i HATE traffic.
assholes.

the boy…

so i*m sitting here online at 1:09am talking to burnout myk*s mom nicki who is the most awesome mom ever, about her husband and stuff. cause i*m so insanely in love with my boy. and he*s leaving. and all i want to do is spend every waking minute with him, hell, every minute even when i*m asleep, making every moment count. she says that if it*s meant to be it*ll happen, and i know she*s right, i just have to live day-to-day and see what happens… he wants to stay now, and it*s because of me, and i feel horrible about that, because i know how badly he wants to leave, and i don*t want to be the reason he doesn*t go. but i love him so much. and i can*t even begin to think what it*ll be like without him. he*s my everything. i have more fun with him than anyone i*ve ever met in my life. even when we*re not doing anything at all. and it*s not perfect. we fight. we argue all the time. but i love him… and he loves me… and i don*t know what the fuck to do anymore…

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welcome to cvs, may i help you?

i just got back from my first day at work.
i got a red vest and a name tag and i*m allowed to sexually harass my friend chris who works there.
fun job.

roar.

parents fucking suck.
to anyone who was with me today, you know damn well what i*m talking about…
phsyical fights, the police, tons of shit…
let*s just say that right now, to put it mildly, i am beyond pissed off and soo tempted to put my entire body through a wall, not just my fist… i am enraged and a half.

he makes me feel emo.

today we were at bom*s house and i was eatin fruit loops and i was only the red ones and the boy asked why and i said cause i like them the best, then he went and picked out all the red ones for me so i could eat just them.
how incredibly sweet?

chaos punx oi. oi oi.

yep. show tonight. casualties, a global threat, violent society, the virus, and two other bands.
good deal.
i thought i wasn*t gonna have fun cause when i got there there was nobody there and it really sucked but eventually people showed up and i had a BLAST which is rare for me now-a-days (haha funny word) at shows. everyone played really good sets, and it was just all around wholesome (pft) fun. yeh.
then i was sittin in penn station with some friends and these kids walk by and i was like ‘heeey punk rock boy’ cause one of em was cute and hes like “hey i was on stage with you!” and we started talking. turns out we*ve been talking online for years cause he lives near me just we never can chill cause of conflicting schedules. and it was awesome.
…and we got in a water fight in the middle of penn station.
good times, good times…

new pic.

dats me and dah boy.
we wear sunglasses even at night.
we are rock stars.
roar.

home…

i*m home… for once… this past week and a half has been a blur. and i finally found the time to sit and update. for most of you who don*t know, i*ve been having the boyfriend-type living with me for almost two weeks. he*s homeless now and on the run, so i*ve been supporting him. we*re doing really well, just since i got my liscence and all we*ve never been home. my father the asshole that he is has been getting really pissy lately so unfortunatly he couldn*t stay here tonight. i just got home from dropping him at a friend*s place where he is crashing for a day or two. and this is the first time we won*t be spending the night in eachother*s arms in a loonnnng time. and i*m NOT looking forward to it.
but tonight we went to friendly*s and got fuckin sick on huge amounts of ice cream and made a mess and had so much fun that even the little kids sitting at the table next to us looked jelous.
he*s still leaving, just staying for a while longer than planned because of some stuff that went down that wasn*t predicted. you know, bullshit.
he makes me so happy… and he*s leaving…
…and he said he loves me…

tomorrah.

show at cbgb*s…
be there or be square.
sex=gooooood.

meh

yeah yeah i know i haven*t updated in forever, but tons of shit has been going down. i*ll update as soon as stuff cools off, and it*s safe to do so.
love you all.
xoxo