college……

so i had a meeting with my guidance counselor today about what colleges i should apply to and i only looked at ones in ny//nj//pa so i could stay close to bill and stuff in case he can*t leave because of probation. but anyway. i haven*t even started applying to colleges yet. just narrowing down my choices. and all of a sudden the two of us are fighting because he doesn*t want a long distance relationship and if i go to college in pa//boston he doesn*t want to be with me and all of a sudden i*m left thinking how did this happen? i haven*t applied, nor have i been accepted, and we*re already talking about not being together because he doesn*t want to have me go off to school b/c he doesn*t want to come with me and give up his band. and i*m like, about to cry because i don*t want to lose him but i don*t want to limit myself to “only new york schools” because of his band. i*d do the long distance relationship thing. hell, i tried when he went to arkansas. it sucked like hell, but it was better than not being with him at all… i don*t know, i*m just really upset//angry right now. and i don*t know why.
all i know is i don*t want to lose him over something this stupid.

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